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Why I Think Women Should Have More of a Say In Their Engagement Rings

When my fiancé was getting ready to propose, I asked to be involved in the engagement ring process. One: I hate surprises. Two: It is a piece of jewelry that I will be wearing for the rest of my life, so I wanted to make sure that it was a piece that I really loved. And, out of all of the engagement rings that we looked at, not only did I love it, but it was actually really inexpensive. For those of you who don’t know, I have a morganite ring from SamnSue.

Let me just say this — while this ring is most important ring, it is not about the ring, but rather what it symbolizes. To this day, every time that I look down at my ring, I still think about the night I got engaged to my fiancé. No matter what my fiancé got, I’m sure the same would have happened. However, many people disagree with this and even think that it is inappropriate — and against tradition— for women to pick out their own rings.

I say, the woman is the one wearing it, therefore she should have a say.

As I am writing this, an episode from Sex and the City comes to mind. Carrie accidentally finds a ring in Aiden’s clothes, and automatically hates it. The ring was picked out with help from Carrie’s friend, Miranda. Carrie didn’t say anything to him, however, by the time he got ready to propose, he swapped it out for a different ring (thanks to some nudging from Samantha).

Now, there is a ton of different elements at play when it comes to purchasing an engagement ring. Budget. Quality. And, of course, everyone is different and has a different style.

According to an article on Goldenet, men want to pick it out on their own because they want to make the proposal a huge surprise. The article then goes onto say that usually that ring is chosen based on five different reasons, including: they think it looks good, they think their girlfriend will like it, they think it will fit the personality of their girlfriend, the design and the stone have some significance to them as individuals and of course, it falls within their budget. This practice, the article says, is meant “to show the strength of a man’s feelings and the firmness of his resolve in committing his life to this one woman.”

On the flip side, the article goes onto say that women want to have a say because of aesthetics, style, and because it makes them feel respected.

We all know what side I am on this. But, I think that all women should have a say in their ring — whether it’s showing their partner to be rings on Pinterest to sending links to even going to the store with them. As I mentioned earlier, I picked out my engagement ring. I have zero regrets about it, because not only did I get a ring that I love, but it took a lot of the stress on my fiancé. Instead, of worrying that I wouldn’t like the ring, he instead worried about planning a memorable night (spoiler alert, he did).

However, there are a few other reasons why women’s opinions should at least be considered in this process. The most obvious one to me at least was the size. My fiancé did not know what my ring size was at all. If he had surprised me, chances are he would have gotten the wrong size. I’m sure that there are other ways for someone to find out a ring size (for example, taking a ring you already have), but at least it solves that mystery.

Secondly, it’s 2022. Women have a larger say in the relationship now and demand to be treated like partners. I think by asking someone at least their preferences shows that you care about them and are choosing to listen to them. For me, that is a great foundation to start the marriage. And, honestly, it could prevent you from picking out something that may or may not fit their overall style.

Like my wedding, I am very against tradition. However, I do think that even if someone asks the partner for their opinion, it doesn’t take the element of surprise away from the moment. (Although if you ask “what engagement ring would you like,” it would send off the vibes that you will be proposing soon just saying).

Finally, I want to also bring up the point that everyone’s stance on this is different. Some people I know are more traditional and want the whole thing where the ring is picked out for them. Others want to have a say. Just like every ring is different, so is every couple in which the ring represents. And, that is perfectly okay.

That said, I do want to empathize one thing. At the end of the day, it is not about the ring. It is not how much that the person spent on said ring. It is the love behind it. If my fiancé had proposed to me with a family heirloom that means the world to him, I would love it just as much because it’s showing that he loves me and cherishes me enough to wear something that means the world to him.

Friday Faves: October 7, 2022

TGIF! It is the Friday before a three day weekend, and I am so ready to get some extra relaxation in. I also am just happy to get some time to focus more on Blogtober and get some work done in the efforts to get ahead.

This week’s list of favorites are kind of all over the place, and that’s okay. So, without further a due, here is a list of this week’s favorites.

Pilates: I’ve been doing a lot of Pilates lately, especially since I now have to run at night. It has been a gentle way to wake up my body, and allow it to stretch, especially as I run more. I also love it because it has a toning element to it as well, which is something that makes it a step up from yoga. I do videos from Move With Nicole on YouTube.

Loft Pants: Now that I work in a more formal business casual setting, this means that I can no longer wear leggings for work. I have been having success buying pants from Loft, and I have really loved them. My personal favorite (to the point where I want to get another pair of them) is the five pocket skinny pants, but I also love their Rivera Slim Pants as well. If you’re looking for affordable business casual wear, I highly recommend checking Loft out.

Athleta Coffee Run Wallet: I got this wallet because I wanted something simple to take my license and keys in it whenever I go for a run that wouldn’t ruin my Louis Vuitton one. I have used it for all of my runs as of late and I am so happy I grabbed this little wallet. I don’t think that I would use it for any other purpose other than working out and hiking, but it’s slim and basically holds the bare minimum.

Outrageous Pumpkins: I began watching this after Hocus Pocus 2 and I have been obsessed with them ever since. It’s basically a pumpkin carving competition, and it’s so cool to watch.

Quiet Quitting Is Becoming Employees Loudest Voice

In honor of Mental Health week, today’s Blogtober prompt is about mental health. In light of that, I am talking about burnout in the office and the viral phenomenon quiet quitting.

The definition of quiet quitting, according to Wikipedia, is “ in which employees work within defined work hours and engage solely in activities within those hours.” Those who quiet quit often do what is in their job description only, and “act their wage.”

This is best demonstrated on the TikTok, Saraisthreads. Her videos demonstrate a toxic office culture, where the boss, Susan tries to get the character Veronica, to do a series of tasks such as stay later, skip lunch, and call her on her vacation. Veronica continually calls HR whenever Susan does something, and thankfully they side with Veronica.

However, this skit is the reality for many in cooperate America.

Office burnout has become more prominent since the early days in the pandemic. According to an article on Apollo Technical entitled Startling Remote Work Burnout Statistics, 77 percent of Americans report that they have felt burnt out at their current position. But, what is even more startling is that 91 percent of them feel unmanageable stress that affects their quality of life and work.

This has gotten way worse in recent years. Thanks to the pandemic, it’s now easier than ever before to log in after hours and on weekends to get work done. Some of this work is simply piled on, while some of this is simply due to the pressure employees feel to qualify for a promotion.

When burnt out to this degree, I think that quiet quitting can be the only option to gain some sort of traction and to essentially allow employees to take their power back. The reality is that we need better work life balance, because when we are constantly put under stress, we are constantly facing the other issues that stress causes, such as issues with mental health, high blood pressure, and the constant exhaustion.

Personally, I think that when a job causes you to feel those symptoms on a consistent basis (not season), than quiet quitting because a way to get the power back. Instead of staying late, quiet quitting allows you to have the ability to leave at their end time. Instead of skipping breaks, quiet quitting allows them to actually get the meals and a breath of fresh air. This is creating boundaries. And, by creating them, we allow us to come to work less stressed and more focused. Essentially, quiet quitting is the way that employees take back the benefits that are rightfully theirs. They are not doing more — they are doing just enough.

With that being said, I don’t think that quiet quitting means not doing a job or being an excuse to just sit at a role all day without being productive. And, I don’t think that means that people should not do their very best at their jobs, because I think if you have a job you should give it one hundred percent because I believe that at the very least if you are paid to do a job, you should do it well.

I also think that it’s not people don’t want to work. I think people are tired and people just are burnt out. Therefore, quiet quitting is the option they choose as they either take the time they need for themselves or look for other employment.

I believe that quiet quitting simply is allowing those to finally get some balance in their lives. When someone is so stressed out, they need to do something. I think when employers notice this in their employers, they should ask what’s wrong and try to make things better for the employee or at least listen to them. Quiet quitting has become a phenomenon, and I hope it’s something that is eye opening to employers.

Furthermore, I believe that quiet quitting allows employees balance. Balance in term allows employees to finally get a breathe of fresh air, which is something that I believe will in turn improve the mental health of cooperate America.

Balance is crucial in today’s world. With the rise of social media, I believe that there is pressure to be perfect at everything and give 100 percent to every category in life from parenting to work. The reality is that is impossible. With the rise of quiet quitting, it gives employers in my opinion a chance to realize that there is more to an employee’s life than their job title. They have families, hobbies and more. They have to take care of themselves. And, with that, I feel as though quiet quitting serves as that reminder.

So, whether you think it’s good or bad, I invite those who are reading this to look deeper into the issue to develop a workplace that will benefit workers overall well being.

Is Hartford’s Beyond Van Gogh Exhibit Worth It?

When you think of Vincent Van Gogh, you think of painted sunflowers and starry night. Now, imagine if you can be immersed into his work.

Hartford’s Beyond Van Gogh does exactly that. Beyond Van Gogh is an immerse exhibit that travels around the world that allow spectators and art lovers a chance to appreciate Van Gogh’s work by simply going inside of his world.

And, it was announced that the exhibit in Hartford has been extended until October 23. According to the website, there are 300 of Van Gogh’s artworks displayed in a gorgeous 4K display. Tickets can be purchased online by going here. But with ticket prices starting at $40 per person, you want to ask yourself if it’s worth the price tag.

The short answer is yes. One hundred percent. Watching this display truly was breathtaking and it felt as though I was actually in one of Van Gogh’s pieces.

The exhibit is in two parts— the first is a history of Van Gogh’s life which tells so many interesting facts. The second is a presentation of his pieces, which bring them right to life. In the presentation, a beautiful orchestra plays in the background which makes this even more amazing.

Pretty cool right?

However, I don’t want to do all of the talking here. Here are some of my pictures that I’ve taken when I went a few weeks back.

Got Writer’s Block? Here’s 31 Blog Post Ideas to Get You Through Blogtober

Writer’s block always seems to come right as when Blogtober is in full swing. Blogtober, for those of you who don’t know or haven’t been following along, is basically writing a post everyday during the month of October. 31 posts in 31 days. So, it’s easy to get a case of writer’s block, especially when you’re used to writing posts 2 to 3 posts a week.

Have no fear. Here are 31 ideas to help you get through the month:

Fall Themed:

Fall Bucket List
Best books to read in the fall
Halloween costume ideas
Best pet/couples costumes
Fall recipe
Fall Playlist
Fall movie/tv shows
Halloween/fall craft
Fall decorating ideas
Halloween Costumes under x amount
Post about a local fall activity/festival
X things you must do in the fall

Fashion:

Fall outfit ideas
Review on accessory
How to style a piece
Fall Fashion Wishlist
A post compiling your outfits of the week.
Fall Fashion Essentials

Lifestyle/General:

Book Review
Album Review
List of your favorite podcasts/influencers/bloggers
Tips on How to Save Money
Opinion Post
Movie review

Wedding:

Tips for planning a fall wedding.
Things I Wish I Did or Did Not Do on My Wedding Day
Review of vendors that you used
Engagement Story
Photo post
Tips on How to Include a Pet in Your Cermoney
Photography ideas

Is the Kendra Scott Elisa Necklace Worth It?

The Elisa necklace from Kendra Scott is by far the most popular product the brand has. According to their TikTok, one necklace sells every minute. And, celebrities such as Lucy Hale are spotted wearing this piece. This necklace is a Kendra Scott staple.

But, is it worth it? Let’s discuss.

The Elisa necklace starts at $55 (but can go up depending on if you use the Color Bar or if you opt for Demi-fine pieces) and comes in silver, rose gold and gold. You can get it with a stone or without a stone. If you do get a stone, I’m sure that they will have your favorite color.

As I mentioned earlier, the necklace comes in either demi-fine or regular. What that means is that there is a sterling silver version that is $140, with the gold vermeil being $170. There is a version without the stone as well.

And, of course, there is the regular version that is either gold plated over brass or the rhodium plated over brass. These are much more affordable and range from $55-$70.

I have the sterling silver plain one, as well as the abalone shell, pink, black, platinum druzy, iridescent druzy, citrine, turquoise and mint blue. And, I love them.

What I really love about these pieces is how simple they are, but they really pack a punch and add a little bit of fun to the outfit. That’s the thing about Kendra Scott pieces. They have fun jewelry pieces that are unique in any way.

Many of my pieces — with the exception of the blues — are neutral so they go with pretty much everything. What I love about the druzy ones is that they can add a little bit of sparkle to a plain outfit. And, while I do tend to wear them on their own, they can be layered with other pieces. They are adjustable, so you can fit it at just the right size for you.

While there are now options for sterling silver or gold plate, this piece started out as being a costume jewelry piece only. For me, that was a hard pill to swallow. I didn’t like that I was paying $55 for a piece of costume jewelry. However, after my first purchase, I realized that the quality of the piece was pretty decent. My tip here is to wait for a Kendra Scott sale, which happen often, and grab it then.

Of course, with costume jewelry, comes the tarnishing. So many reviews of this piece discuss this at length. This almost made me want to pass on the item. To date, I have not had that happen. I also do not shower with them on, and take them off prior to sleeping. When I’m not wearing them, I put them in their jewelry pouch for safe keeping.

That said, what I have heard is that Kendra Scott does in fact replace pieces that have tarnished from wear. You can review their policy here.

So, do I recommend this necklace?

Yes.

This is a great piece for anyone because it’s so easy to wear. You can get it in any metal or color that you want. In fact, you can get different stone colors so you can match it to any outfit. You can adjust it to any length too. It’s great to layer or wear on its own. You can wear it casually or dressed up.

The limit does not exist with this one.

But, I would suggest two things. One: wait for a sale or sign up for Kendra Scott’s birthday emails. Two: wear with caution. Take care of your piece and you’ll be good to go.

Karabin Farms in Southington Offers All Of the Classic Fall Things Nutmeggers Enjoy

There is nothing like fall in Connecticut. The foliage, the flavors, and the activities are all apart of the fall in CT experience. And, what are the activities do you ask? Well, apple and pumpkin picking definitely tops that list. And, Southington’s Karabin Farms offers just that.

Located on Andrews Road, Karabin Farms is tucked away when you drive up to it. They are open year round, and offer everything from springtime flowers to Christmas trees. During the fall, you can pick apples, pumpkins and of course, walk into the store to pick up some delicious baked goodies and other farm fresh foods (I had an apple cider donut before I left the premises — trust me, it was delicious). And, their store is open daily from 9-5.

While you can pick your own apples, this store has a ton of apples ready for you to enjoy. Additionally, it is stocked with other farm fresh produce, dairy, meat, and vegetables. And of course, there were a ton of delicious treats. What sold me was the apple cider donuts, but they also have muffins, breads and cupcakes.

What I loved about this place was just how simple and casual that it was. And, the prices were not bad for homemade products. The apple cider donuts were six for $5.50. I’ve been to a ton of fall places over the years, and this one was just a place that you can stop on your way home. For me, once of the best things about it was that it was a little place to go and get your pumpkins. I recommend it for kids and adults as we head towards the spooky season as a fun place to just enjoy all of the traditions of fall that Connecticut has to offer.

Rethinking Blogtober This Year

If I am going to be honest with you, I was not planning on doing this year’s Blogtober. I did in 2020 and 2021. And, if I am going to be honest, I am going to credit it as being a huge reason why my blog had grown as much as it did. I met some really cool bloggers. I had a ton of web traffic, because I was producing a ton of content. And, it was a great way to truly see my creativity flourish. I tried out posts that I never would have normally, and I enjoyed it.

Honestly, it was exhausting.

If you’re not familiar with what Blogtober is, it is basically when you write 31 posts (one for each day of October). Many bloggers (well those who don’t procrastinate like yours truly) often preplan their posts so that by the time that October 1st rolls around, they are ready to go and just need to promote it.

But, for some odd reason, I just couldn’t bring myself to do Blogtober, even though I wanted to be able to. When July and August rolled around, I just couldn’t think of what to even write. And, I have been going through major writer’s block throughout the month of September. So, the thought of writing 31 posts in 31 days was absolutely overwhelming. And, this is without the fact that every post meant that I would be posting on my social media channels to draw traffic to it.

I love blogging, but after every Blogtober, I would honestly get burnt out. And, by the end of it, sometimes I would notice that the quality of my posts would go down so much, because I would be posting just for the sake of posting.

So, this year, I decided to do something a little different. Yes, I am still participating in Blogtober. But, instead of just writing on my blog, I will also be posting on my Instagram as well. This is just so I don’t get overwhelmed, but also to help grow my Instagram following as well. I hope to at least have 15-20 posts on this blog, but if I don’t, I will for sure by posting either a reel or a photo.

Maybe that is cheating. However, I also want to make sure that I am taking care of myself and making sure that blogging still remains fun. I also want to continue posting quality content without the pressure of just getting a blog post out.

So, welcome October, welcome to my own version of Blogtober. Please follow along on my Instagram @ thenutmegmillennial, and tag along here for some great posts.

Friday Faves: September 30, 2022

Happy Friday and happy day prior to Blogtober. If you’re a blogger, than you know the stress is about to become real. I have a post explaining in detail all about the changes this Blogtober will be bringing. However, I did want to share some of my favorites of the week with you prior to the kickoff of Blogtober. So, here are this week’s favorites:

Old Navy Ultra High Rise Jeans: I got these when Old Navy ran their promotion for jeans that are $15. Let me tell you that these are the best jeans that I’ve owned as of late. They make my body feel so sculpted, and they are really comfortable to wear. I’ve worn them out, and it honestly felt as though these were leggings, not denim. Good job, Old Navy.

Tell Me Lies TV Show: I loved the book, so naturally I tuned into Hulu to watch the show. And, while it’s different than the book was, I really am enjoying it. I have two more episodes until I’m fully caught up, so that is something that I will be doing this weekend.

Birkenstock Boston Clogs: I am a huge Birkenstock girl. Therefore, the fact that these shoes allow me to wear my favorite type of shoe throughout the year is why they are my new favorite.

Too Good to Be True by Carola Loverig: I was obsessed with Tell Me Lies, and I decided to pick up another book from the author. This time, it’s Too Good to be True. This tells the story of our main character who is diagnosed with OCD. She meets Burke, and the two are engaged in six months. Only, it is revealed that Burke has a hidden agenda. I am about 33 percent of the way through, and trust me, I’m sure that I will be devouring this one very quickly.

Are the Birkenstock Boston Clogs Worth It?

They are viral. They are sold out everywhere. They are the fall shoe to have. Influencers are spotted wearing them. What are they? The Birkenstock Boston Clog.

If you know me, you know that I wear the Birkenstock sandals to death during the spring, summer and fall time. And, with good reason. They have amazing support and I can wear them for hours without them bothering my feet. I also love that I can wear my sandals with dresses, leggings, jeans and even shorts. So, when I learned that there was a clog version, I could not run fast enough to purchase them. Thankfully, they had my size in the black and I snatched them up faster than you can say “add to cart.”

I got mine in my true size and they fit just like a charm. I’m not sure if I’ll be wearing socks with them yet, but I think I have the option.

Now, it is cold enough to actually wear them, and I couldn’t be more happier than I jumped on these.

So far, I’ve worn them a few different ways. The first is to work. I paired them with a pair of ponte pants and a long sweater and they were perfect.

I did wear them for play as well. I went to the Beyond Van Gogh experience this past weekend and wore them. They went extremely well with the outfit. I had on a long sleeved t shirt and some skinny jeans. And, they were really comfortable and I was able to walk around without my feet hurting.

Now, are they worth the hype?

I’d say yes! Like I said, I already love the brand as it is, so I came in a little biased. But, these shoes are a great investment piece because of the quality (I’ve worn mine to death and they still look great), the comfort and the fact that they go with any and everything. For me, having a pair of qualify shoes that you can count on for years is definitely worth the price tag.

That said, these shoes are really hard to come by, because they are sold out everywhere. So, I do recommend checking out places like Nordstrom, HSN, and LL Bean. You can also sign up for in stock emails for when they came in. I know I already have to grab the other color. I did find a pair of mens that were in the same size as the women’s, so we’ll see how that goes.