Why I Refuse To Be A Victim

Raise your hands if you’ve ever been broken up with or suffered the cruel effects of heartbreak. Okay, now keep them up if you met someone new, but still nursed the effects of a broken heart – and, as a result, caused you to keep them at a safe distance away.

Relationships – and life in general – can deal you a bad hand on occasion. Sometimes, you are dealt with something like a bad breakup, anxiety, depression, an eating disorder, physical health issues, and so on. These circumstances can cause you to claim one specific title – the victim.

You see, there are two types of people in any given situation – the people who do something to hurt or offend the other and the person who gets hurt. With that being said, there are plenty of situations where this doesn’t apply such as anxiety or depression.

When going through something traumatic no matter what it may be, you have to stop what you are doing to tend to those wounds, both physical and mental. Otherwise, it will build up to a boulder that can knock you down permanently. But, once the feelings have been felt and the scars begin to fade, the title of the victim should as well. It’s not easy, but with persistence and a few stumbles, eventually you’ll be as good as new.

I know so many people – myself included – that keep perfectly nice people at bay because they are afraid of what happened to them occurring again. Eventually, though, you’ve got to stop playing the victim. You have got to stop letting the scars and minor pain from long ago cloud how you approach current situations.

Today, I am going to do just that. Sure, I have had my share of pain, broken hearts, and shitty situations. But, I am no longer interested in using it as a shield to keep love from pouring in. Instead, I am ready to drop that title, and make it less significant. I want to let that love that I so rightfully deserve into my life and heart. Yes, I have anxiety about it (both literally as a person with anxiety and having anxiety about doing so), but allowing myself to run away from a situation simply because I am not ready to let love in due to fear is no longer an option.

So, I am not a victim. I no longer will allow myself to hide behind the title’s crown. Instead, I am a survivor. And, I am not going to let anything – my past, my anxiety, or anything else for that matter – get in my way. Why? Because, I deserve it. I deserve to feel love, and playing the victim won’t get me there.

And so, let’s try to stumble out from what hurt us and look at the world with fresh eyes. By allowing it to keep us down only does one thing — let it win. And, screw it, I deserve to win. Not my broken heart. Not the person who caused it. Not my anxiety. Nothing will get in my way from being happy.

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