How I’m Managing My Mental Health During This Holiday Season

Is it me or my stress levels have amplified so much within the next week? Between balancing work, self care, and all of the family obligations that come with the end of the year, I am overwhelmed. I mean, we all remember when Clark Griswold loses it towards the end of National Lamphoon’s Christmas Vacation. It is the most wonderful and stressful time of the year.

And I am not alone. According to a survey conducted by the American Psychological Association, 89 percent of Americans felt stressed during the 2023 holiday season. What is even more concerning is that 41 percent of them reported higher stress levels during the holiday season versus any other time of year.

It makes sense. As I mentioned previously, my calendar is getting filled with not only fun things, but other end of the year appointments and obligations. Furthermore, another reason why the holidays are particularly stressful during this time of year for me is the fact that feelings of grief come up as Christmas was my late mother’s favorite time of year.

With that being said, I’m trying to enact some sort of plan, if you will, to prioritize self care during this time of year.

The first is allowing myself breaks and giving myself grace. I am crocheting and knitting about half of my gifts this year. This fact alone is very overwhelming, because I have a lot of things to make. Crocheting and knitting is not only very time consuming, but can also wreck havoc on my hands if I don’t give myself a chance to move around and take a break. One thing that I did months ago is start making my gifts earlier, so about 75 percent of them are already done. This also applies to anything — work, blogging, and more. I’m doing Blogtober this year, and it’s been a challenge to say the least to write 25 posts. In fact, it is day 5, and I already missed one day. At the end of the day, it’s about giving myself grace and allowing myself a well deserved break to read.

Secondly, I am allowing myself to actually feel. Grief is an overwhelming thing that can consume me to the point where it leaves me crippling. Therefore, if I need to cry, I am going to cry! Also, I give myself a Christmas gift every year like I would give my mom, so that’s something that always helps.

In addition, I’m going to be taking care of my body. I’m going to be working out, and blocking out time to get my 10,000 steps, whether it’s outside or doing a class. I’m going to therapy. I’m going to be drinking my water. I’m going to make sure I eat. I’ve been working on taking care of myself, truly, and this is something that I will be doing more so throughout the holidays when it’s just easier to let that go.

Finally, I’m going to be setting boundaries as much as I can. The biggest way I can do so is with my schedule and being selective of what I can and can’t do.

How are you taking care of your mental health this holiday season? Let me know in the comments below.

Q and A with Kristen from Kset Shop

Photo Credit: Kristen Setter

Kset Shop is your go-to place for any and all holiday attire shopping. During this time of year, I’m craving something new, sparkly, and something that just will be something that I reach for for all of the holiday events that are coming up. I had an opportunity to chat with the founder, Kristen, all about her personal style, and recommendations for those who are looking for a little something special to wear. Be sure to follow her shop on Instagram, where you can follow her pop ups and drops as well.

How did you get started with Kset? 

I just started Kset on September 13th. I was originally working for an agency that temporarily hired people for fashion trade shows while also working for a personal stylist in Greenwich. I recognized I really enjoyed the markets held by these fashion companies and I loved seeing the new trends before they came out. I liked working for the different vendors, but I definitely quickly realized I preferred being the buyer. I was always the friend in high school and college that everyone borrowed clothes from and I always heard that people had liked my style. When I mentioned the idea to my friends they were all so supportive and told me this is what I was meant to do so after being confused of what i wanted to do after graduating it seemed like everything just fell into place.

What are your top items for the holiday season? 

My top items for the holiday season are definitely jackets, sweaters (especially ski inspired sweaters), and sweater dresses.

What do you recommend for any upcoming holiday parties? 

I recommend the burgundy velvet dress, this sequin cheetah one (maybe for new years!), or a sweater dress for upcoming holiday parties.

What is your go-to outfit on a daily basis? 

My go-to outfit on a daily basis is honestly our Polly jeans. They are the MOST comfortable jean (I can eat in them and do not feel restricted at all; they are so stretchy) paired with a sweater or off the shoulder top.

How does sizing work? 

My sizing depends on each vendor. Typically I am wearing a small and if I am not I will include that information in the description of the product. Certain pieces are S-L and others are XS-XL. It really depends on the vendor because the items come to me prepacked (aka I don’t get to choose the sizes).

How would you describe your personal style? 

I am not really sure what my personal style is. I think I dip into a lot of different buckets. I can be super girly one day and super edgy the next. I just like items that I find interesting and different. I never liked wearing the same thing as everyone else.

What are the same basics you recommend getting on your site? 

Some basics I recommend getting on my site are definitely my jeans and sweaters/ cardigans.

You share some of the pop-ups you do online. Where are some events that you’ll be popping up?

I will be popping up at SkinbarCT on 12/5 in Wallingford from 5-7, Westport Museum for History and Culture on Saturday 12/7 from 11-4 PM and at Stony Creek on Sunday 12/15 from 12-5.

Welcome to Blogmas and the Benefits of Blogmas!

Merry Blogmas 2024! This is my fourth year doing Blogmas this year, and I am so excited to participate to help get into the habit of blogging at a more regular basis again.

At this time, I don’t have a complete list of the posts that I plan to share with you, but I did want to spend some time talking about the benefits of participating in Blogmas if you’re on the fence on participating this year.

But, before I begin, let’s get something out of the way. What is Blogmas? Blogmas, or vlogmas for those who post vlogs on YouTube or TikTok, is posting a blog or a vlog everyday for the month of December leading up to Christmas. Yes, it’s exhausting. However, I have found that it is worth it. Here’s why:

  1. Create Traffic: One of the best parts about doing Blogmas is the fact that it is such a great way to boost your end of the year statistics by boosting the amount of SEO that you have going onto your site, simply by producing more posts. This is a great way to not only end the year, but to start the year. January is historically a slower month for content creation, but having a little bit of the page views straggling from the previous month definitely helps.
  2. Start Creating a Habit: Consistency is key when it comes to creating content of any kind. As I mentioned earlier, Blogmas is going to serve as my way to create a habit as a blogger. This challenge, at least for me, is a way to reinstate a habit that has slowly begun to slip away. I’m not saying I’m going to post 25 posts in the month of January, but I want to try to get better at writing more than 1-4 posts a month. Furthermore, I do balance blogging along with working full time, so I do want to make sure to share the importance of giving myself grace as to when it comes to my lack of writing.
  3. Start the New Year Off Right: As I mentioned, Blogmas causes a huge spike of eyes in my page views. This bleeds into the new year, which is extremely motivating for me to continue another year of blogging. I still get page views on posts that I’ve written back in 2021/2022, so this definitely helps keep my page views on the higher side long after the post has been published.
  4. Grow Your Audience: Oftentimes, Blogmas has caused me to venture out of my comfort zone and create a post that I normally would not. Let me just say this — it is really fun to experiment with different types of posting! With this, it definitely helps me grow the people who read my blog on a regular basis, as well those who follow it on social media. That growth alone is 1000% worth it if you ask me!

Are you participating in Blogmas? Let me know in the comments below!

November Favorites

The fact that it’s December now is mind blowing to me. I am excited for the holiday season, the treats, the cozy vibes, and more. However, it feels like 2024 just flew on by.

While I’m happy to share my favorites for the month of November, I am also happy to announce that I am actually participating in Blogmas this year! Blogmas has been something I’ve done on and off for the past few years of my blogging career. I’ve decided to do it this year, because I’ve noticed my frequency of posting has declined over the last few months, and I want to get into the habit of posting regularly. I may not make it everyday to post, however, anything is better to me than 2-3 posts a month.

That being said, let’s kick off Blogmas with my favorites from November!

Chestnut Springs series: Everyone on Bookstagram, BookTok, and Booktube raves and raves about this series. Up until this month, the first one has been on my Kindle for what it seems like forever. This is one of those series that seems to get better with every book. At the time of writing this, I am on the last one of these, and I am so sad that this series is about to be over to me, because I am not ready to say goodbye to these characters.

Coach Cary Crossbody: This is such an underrated Coach bag. Unfortunately, this one is no longer available on the Coach website, however, you can purchase it at Macy’s, and Bloomingdale’s. I recommend this bag because it’s a bag that goes with everything and can be worn either crossbody or on the shoulder.

Baggu Keychain: Baggu has amazing items. I love this keychain because it not only goes with my bag, but I can easily find my key fob whenever I need to use it.

How to End a Love Story by Yulin Kuan: This was absolutely amazing. This is a book that tells the story of Helen, whose sister died by suicide by jumping in front of a moving car. Grant was the driver at the car. Thirteen years later, Grant and Helen are brought together by Grant being the writer of the series adaption of Helen’s books. I absolutely loved this book. The end was honestly frustrating, but I enjoyed the series. There are a lot of trigger warnings, don’t get me wrong. However, I do think it was worth the read.

Best Purchases of 2024

As we venture into the gift giving season, I wanted to take a moment to reflect on the things that I have been loving this year. Many of these have been items that I have loved throughout the year. They have been used regularly, if not daily. They have been items that bring me joy throughout the year and I’ve gotten my money’s worth.

Kindle Paperwhite: I had to unexpectedly replace my Kindle this year. I’m kind of glad I did, as this was just before the new ones came out and I really am glad I got this one. I am a Kindle girly through and through and this was a must have for this year.

Furls Crochet Hooks: As a crochet girly, I am always crocheting; however, I would get cramped when doing long crochet sessions. These hooks have been a game changer. Are they pricey? Yes. But they are 100 percent worth it. My trick has been to upgrade my hooks one at a time whenever they are on sale. I now can’t crochet with anything else and recommend this to anyone who loves to crochet as much as I do.

Sketchers GoWalk: These are a pair of shoes that I wear almost daily whenever I go for a walk. I also use these are easy go shoes because they just slip on, hands free. They are also so comfortable and had no break in time.

Coach Brooklyn 28: This bag went viral. And for good reason. It’s small but holds much more than the bag looks. It’s a classic style. The quality is unmatched. Coach bags get better with age and this bag reminds me of my vintage 90s bags. This is 100 percent worth the hype and will be a classic style in my collection for years to come.

Jai Boxchain Bracelet: This bracelet has been around since my mom watched QVC back in the day. I purchased this earlier this year and it’s been on constant rotation in my stacks. It’s easy to layer and goes with anything that I wear.

Free People Quilted Carryall Bag: This bag has been a go-to for many different functions. It’s an amazing work bag especially when I went to the gym. It’s an amazing travel bag. It’s comfortable and easy to wear. I recommend this to anyone who needs a new bag for those reasons because this bag is amazing.

How My Self Care Has Evolved In Taking Care of my Inner and Outer Self

I am ultimate peace when I’m in yoga class. For 50 minutes, I am inhaling and exhaling, completely ignorant to what is going on in the world. My phone is in my bag, on silent. It is there I’m giving myself the permission to breathe and the permission to just be — to be present, to be in the moment, to be relaxed.

I am going to be completely honest here. I have not been taking care of myself these days.

The last three months have been brutal on my physical and mental health. In August of this past year, my doctor switched my antidepressants, in which I had the side effects of losing my hair as well as my train of thought. In September, not only was I switched again to a different antidepressant, but I had to evaluate my relationships and friendships. My anxiety has increased, and over the last few months, my blood pressure (I have high blood pressure, thanks genetics) has spiked, causing an increase of my medications.

Once that happened, it caused me to take a step back to realize that I need to put myself first and do the things I need to do to improve my own physical and mental wellbeing. I needed to drink more water. I needed to add some healthy foods in my overall diet and eliminate the unhealthy ones. I also need to learn how to do the work, give myself grace, and allow myself the opportunity to learn that sometimes, just sometimes, I need to use my voice to either say, hey, I need a moment to breathe or hey, this isn’t working for me.

Needless to say, when my blood pressure spiked it was a huge wake up call for me.

Ever since the pandemic, I feel like the world has become more and more focused on wellness, although I’ve noticed that it has slowly bounced back into the way things were before it with the hustle and bustle. For me, wellness is fully rounded for both physical and mental health. I also believe that one aspect of it can impact the other.

I’ve begun to feel guilty about taking care of myself, which often happens when things begin to ramp up. As my calendar loads up with other tasks and events, I often forget the importance of the simple, obvious things for self-care, such as making time for a workout, drinking water, or hitting the mat for a yoga class.

Nowadays, self-care has changed so much for me. Self care has now evolved to: making sure I get at least 7,500 steps a day, drinking water, making sure I do workout, giving myself permission to rest and to just lie in bed and scroll, journal, make time for medical and mental health appointments, and allow myself some fresh air. All of those are simple, but can get lost in the shuffle.

I’ve preached since the start of this blog that self care is not selfish. I still stand by that. I just need to remember to actually listen to the words that I’ve written.

That being said, I hope that this post reaches someone who needs that reminder that self-care is something that needs to be added back into your routine.

What’s In My Bag Wednesday: Coach Hadley

Coach had two viral bags this fall. The first is the Brooklyn, which is a style that I have loved and raved about for a while now (you can view my posts about that bag here). The second is a bag from the Coach Outlet called the Hadley.

The Hadley is a bag that appeared on my TikTok newsfeed a few months ago, with the suede option being one of the most popular of the colorways. After hemming and hawing over whether or not I wanted to add this bag to my collection, I finally caved. And when it finally arrived, I switched into it and haven’t switched out of it.

What I like about the Hadley bag versus the Coach Brooklyn is that the very fact that you have options. There are three ways to wear this bag: crossbody and over the shoulder on the longest setting and then the short setting over the shoulder. Shoulder bags have been all of the rage this year and this bag is easy to just throw over the shoulder and go.

That being said, this bag holds a ton. Here’s what I carry in this bag on a daily basis:

October 2024 Favorites

It’s the start of a new month, so that means that it’s time to share my favorites of the previous. This past month I spent a lot of time binging some shows, and loved every minute of it.

One Star Romance by Laura Hankin: This book was so good, that I did not give it one star. I gave it five. This book took place over the span of 10 years, and was about the maid of honor and the best man, who had given the maid of honor’s book one star on Goodreads. They, connected though their mutual friends, run into each other during each event. This was the ultimate enemies to lovers story, and I absolutely loved it.

The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives: I was addicted to this show the past month. I just immersed myself in this reality television world, and absolutely loved it and already can’t wait for the second season.

Coach Outlet Pouch Wristlet: I am so obsessed with this, to the point where I have this in both black and brown. I love this because it’s a small cube of a wristlet, that allows me to fit even my car keys and even a little lip gloss, because we all know that I have a ton of those. I highly recommend this one over the other more famous version of the wristlet because you can fit so much more.

Tell Me Lies: I finally got around the second season of this show, and let me tell you, it was intense, guys. The finale left my jaw on the floor. I can’t wait for season three.

Ruinous Love Trilogy: Another series that I’ve been reading and binging is the Ruinous Love trilogy. I read the first two books, and absolutely loved them. They were spicy, addictive, and passionate. You can feel the angst bleeding off of the pages. I highly recommend these if you are looking for something that is both smut and passionate.

Tree Hut Pumpkin Spice Scrub: Last but certainly not least is this scrub. I have been loving the scent of this product, as it’s the perfect scent for fall, and I’ve been enjoying using this up. And, I already purchased a backup for this as I’ve been running low.

MarkItLikeItsHot Is The Ultimate Booklover’s Paradise

Photo Credit: Courtney Fisler

From stickers to bookmarks, the Etsy shop MarkItLikeItsHot has everything a bookworm could love and then some from stickers to booksleeves to her adorable bookmarks. Courtney, the shop owner, has an amazing selection of goodies, from seasonal to funny little quotes that draw a smile from a book lover.

I’ve had the excellent opportunity to chat with Courtney about her shop, brand, and of course, books. I invite you to continue reading, and then give her a follow on Instagram!

Photo Credit: Courtney Fisler

Tell me about your brand. How did you get your Etsy shop started? 

My Etsy shop is markitlikeitshot. I sell bookmarks, stickers, book sleeves, kindle sleeves & blind dates with a book!  I started my business in the summer of 2022. I had refound my love of reading and I hate dog earring, so I was just using random objects as bookmarks. I was also nannying that summer & the kids loved to read so I suggested going to get some fun things to make bookmarks. From there things just spiraled and I’ve never looked back. Things have grown way more than I ever expected!

How do you get inspiration for your bookmarks, and stickers? 

Majority of the artwork in my shop comes from other small artists – I will have ideas in mind for a launch and then pick artwork that fits the theme. Every once in a while when I have an idea I’ll turn it into a bookmark but graphic design is not my strong suit. I love the chance to support other small businesses by purchasing artwork for my shop as well! 

Photo Credit: Courtney Fisler

Are items made to order?

I mostly run my shop on inventory so it is made and then listed online, it helps to keep processing time quick! I have worked with people on custom orders though! 

How often do you update the shop or have drops? 

I try and do a drop every other month or so but it just depends on how busy life is at the time! I am always working on the next set of products though 😊

Do you have any other bookish items in your shop? 

I sell bookmarks, stickers, book sleeves, kindle sleeves & blind dates with a book! 

Can you describe what your monthly subscription is? 

For my monthly subscription I send out three bookmarks at the beginning of every month. One bookmark is the exclusive bookmark of the month that only can be gotten through subscription, and then I picked two bookmarks from the shop each month as well. 

What are you reading currently? 

I am currently reading. Say you still love me by K. A. Tucker.

Do you have a favorite genre? 

romance & thriller!

Photo Credit: Courtney Fisler

In addition to running a Bookish Etsy shop, you also have an amazing and aesthetic bookstagram. Do you have any advice for growing a bookstagram? 

I think one of the best ways to grow your cat is just to Make genuine interactions with other people! As far as making content, I find it easiest to batch content and schedule it for the week! 

Is the Coach Brooklyn Worth It?

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Over the past year, I have taken a deep dive into Coach bags, both vintage and new. One bag that has made the list of obsessions, and has gone viral is none other than the Coach Brooklyn. For me, this is reminiscent of the leather vintage Coach bags that I have taken joy with restoring.

The Coach Brooklyn blew up over the summer. At first, the bag came in two sizes — the 28 and the 39 — but recently, Coach introduced the 23 as well. The bag comes in a gorgeous Coach cherry red, black, dark stone, and the famous Maple brown that is always sold out. I currently have the 23 and the 28. Personally, I feel that the 39 is huge, but it would make the perfect work bag since it is rumored to fit a laptop.

The bag is such a simple bag. No matter what size, It is a simple shoulder leather bag with a magnetic snap enclosure, however, the Brooklyn 23 comes with a gold chain crossbody option.

That being said, I have been using the Brooklyn as my go-to daily bag. I have two 28s, the black and the Maple, and I am absolutely obsessed with them. The 28 is my daily ride or die bag. It fits everything that I can possibly need — work ID to wallet to even my Kindle Paperwhite. I have used it for weeks on end without switching the bag, and if you’re a bag lover like me, you know that speaks volumes.

As for the 23, I find that it is the perfect weekend/on the go bag. It fits my phone, wallet, a lip balm, and a hand sanitizer. While it is smaller that the Brooklyn, it still is perfect for both day to night.

What I love about the bag personally is the fact that it is such a classic piece. It is something that I can wear daily, and with any outfit. There are no logos — other than the gold stamped Coach on the very top, so it’s something that can truly last for a while.

It is also effortless. For both sizes, I can just throw them on and not have to worry about the bag being too casual or too dress. For the 28, I can just load it up with my stuff and throw it on my shoulder. Easy peasy. That is something that I absolutely love about a good quality piece in my wardrobe.

That being said, I do have a few complaints. The first is that due to the magnetic closure, there is no zipper. Most of the time, this is not a problem, however, sometimes when the bag flops over — which it is known to do because this bag doesn’t have much structure especially when it’s empty — stuff does come out. For me, this usually means something small comes out like a lip gloss or something of that nature.

Secondly and quite possibly the biggest complaint that I have with this bag is the fact that the only option I have to wear this bag, at least for the 28, is on the shoulder. I love a good shoulder bag, don’t get me wrong, but I need to also sometimes have the option for a crossbody for when I need to be hands free when walking around.

And finally, one thing that is not a compliant, but is something that I would like to see is Coach coming out with a size that is in between the 28 and the 39. The 39 is much, much, much too big for me, however, sometimes, the 28 can be too small. It’s not a compliant, like I said, however, it’s something that I wouldn’t mind seeing from Coach in the future.

With that being said, I do think that the bag is worth it. The quality, in my opinion, is so much better than some of the luxury bags that are circulating on the market these days. Furthermore, the fact that this is a bag that can be worn with so many things makes it something that is easily worn all day everyday. I keep on going back to this bag because I miss it, and it’s something that I am sure that I am going to wear not only in the upcoming months, but in the upcoming years. Talk about a great investment piece. As I get older, bags like these are something that I tend to gravitate towards, and this one is no exception.

Overall, this is a bag that I can see being worth it — no matter what size you go for. However, if you’re like me and want to also have a crossbody option, this bag may not be the best choice for you.